[uh-oh & well done discipline jar]
Thank you to my new BFF and total time sucker, Pinterest, I found a really great idea for discipline called the "Uh Oh" jar. I must confess that the majority of things I pin I know I will most likely never implement, and yet, I continue to pin. I pin and pin and pin. I think it helps me feel as though I have accomplished something in the little window of time that I have to myself. I don't have quite enough time to tackle a DIY project or make something from start to finish, but the craziness that is my creative brain feeds off inspiration. So, I sit down and I pin. Am I alone in this?
Well, this Uh-Oh jar pin was super timely because we are in a season of parenting boot camp. You know the one where you feel like all of the sudden your children are really rusty in all areas of obedience. They are not listening the first time, they are negotiating, they are arguing, they are tattling, they are entitled, and in general kind of not fun to be related to. That is how I have felt.
The Uh-Oh discipline jar is a jar filled with extra chores (empty the dishwasher, empty all the trash cans in the house, sweep the porch, clean out the car, dust the bookshelves, clean the sink, clean the front of the fridge, etc.) that my children earn when they exhibit any of these behaviors. Someone argues - I say, "Uh-Oh. Please go pull a consequence." And, they do. I always give them a gentle hug and reiterate what behavior standard I expect. "I know that you can listen the first time and honor my words without arguing."
The front of my fridge has never been cleaner. Nor have my bookshelves.
We also decided to implement a "Well Done" discipline jar. This is the fun part for my husband and I. We are good behavior scouts and we are looking for behavior that is above and beyond. You probably won't get a well done for listening the first time. But, you probably would get a well done if your brother spills his water and you step up to clean it without being asked. Or, if you encourage someone when normally you might criticize. The Well Done discipline jar is my children's new obsession. It is filled with fun privileges like piece of bubble gum, 4 m&m's, choose a treat from the treat jar, 10 extra minutes of cuddles with mama/papa at bedtime, 15 minutes of screen time, you earned a quarter, stay up 15 minutes later, you choose what game we play, etc.
I totally get that we want our kids to be motivated to do good internally, and to not "perform". But, I also think that when children begin to practice certain behaviors that these behaviors stick.
The Uh-Oh and Well Done discipline jars are working for us. They are our Super Nanny.
Here is the link to the sheet I used to cut out the consequences/privileges. Feel free to use if you wish!