The Gratitude Challenge

Gratitude has been one of the recurring themes over the past few years of my life. It seems that I am learning the same lesson over and over. Focus on remembering how blessed you are, Ali.

It is amazing how different the world looks through a lens of gratitude.

I gave myself a challenge this past week. I decided that every time I started to feel frustrated or anxious about anything at all, that I would intentionally think of something I am thankful for in that moment. It was powerful.

Traffic. - I am so glad I have a car.

Son asking to be held as I am trying to make dinner. - Wow, this guy will not always fit in my lap. I love his precious, cuddly disposition.

Wishing for a bigger house and feeling slightly sorry for myself. - I have a roof over my head and my kids are warm at night.

Husband is running late for dinner. - He is on his way. He is safe.

It has been powerful.

I remember having this same realization in college. It is a season of life where people tend to favor fun over sleep. Most students on their way to class would rather be somewhere else, and most often this "somewhere else" is in bed still sleeping. I remember one day where nearly every person I ran into seemed to outdo the last with how tired they were. If I said that I was up until 1:30 AM writing a paper, you were most likely up until 3. I reached a point where I realized if the first thought I had every morning was, "I am so tired. ugh ugh ugh, " that my day wasn't starting on the most optimistic note. I began to challenge myself to wake with a bit more hope for the day, or at least, not verbalizing it all day. Because, if you walk around all day saying, "I'm so tired", you are certainly going to feel tired all day long.

Think of how often co-workers complain about the boss, the work environment, the job or the clients.

Think about how often we complain about our kids to one another.

Think about how often we complain about our husbands.

I am not saying don't keep it real. I am not encouraging brain washing yourself. I am just saying - it has made a huge difference for me to intentionally choose to have a posture of gratitude.

What are you grateful for today?

Talk Back: eating out for dinner

How often do you eat out for dinner? What are your tips for cutting costs while eating out? What are your tips for eating out with kids?  Do you have any secrets for making it an enjoyable experience?  Where do you like to go?

Muffins for kids and a confession

OK. I admit it. I went through a phase where I pureed every vegetable known to mankind and tried to hide it in a muffin so that my oldest son, "the challenging eater" would get some vegetables in his diet.

It all started when a well known celebrity wife put out her own cookbook that toted spinach brownies, cookies with zucchini, yellow squash cupcakes and more. I bought that cookbook with excitment, determination and gusto. I religiously cooked and steamed my organic vegetables, and then froze them in ice-cube trays as instructed so that I would be prepared at all times to use them in the above mentioned recipes. Yes, I was keen.

I tried almost every recipe in that book. A few were a hit but many were a miss. It got so bad that my husband would pass on whatever I had baked without even knowing what it was and the kids would just look at me suspiciously whenever I offered them a cookie. Even the dog would simply sniff at then walk away from any bits that had fallen to the floor. Soon, I was even more frustrated than I was before I engaged in this adventure because now I had dozens of cookies, muffins and loaves that no one would eat.

Time to face reality.

There are a lot of great muffin and cookie recipes out there that are delicious and healthy. The key is just to remember to not go overboard. Carrots have their place in a muffin and so does zucchini if it is paired with enough sweetness and spice. But once you cross the line and start to incorporate vegetables best suited to go with your Sunday roast or that you have to puree to hide, you're heading for trouble. Trust me. I know. I've been there. Many. Times. Over.

So, to end all the craziness, a recipe. A good old fashioned muffin that in not only good for you but tastes fantastic too. You'll love them, the husband will eat them and the kids will thank you. Make a big batch and freeze half for another time. They'll be good frozen for up to 3 months.

Carrot Spice Mini Muffins

(Adapted from Baking From My Home to Yours by Dorie Greenspan: Makes 36 mini muffins)

Ingredients:

2 cups flour

1/2 cup sugar

1 tablespoon baking powder

1 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon ground ginger

1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/3 cup (packed) light brown sugar
2/3 cup canola or safflower oil
2 large eggs
3/4 cup whole milk (I only had skim so I used 1/2 cup skim milk and 1/4 cup vanilla yogurt)
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
1 cup shredded carrots (I put them in the food processor so they would be fine)
1/2 cup shredded sweetened coconut
1/3 cup moist, plump raisins

Directions:
Preheat the oven to 375˚F.

Butter or spray the 12 molds in a regular-size muffin pan or fit the molds with paper muffin cups. Then place the muffin pan on a baking sheet.

In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, sugar, baking powder, cinnamon, ginger, baking soda and salt. Stir in the brown sugar, making certain there are no lumps.

In a separate bowl, whisk the oil, eggs, milk and vanilla extract together until well combined.

Pour the the liquid ingredients over the dry ingredients and with a rubber spatula, gently but quickly sir to blend. Stir in the carrots, coconut, raisins and nuts. Divide the batter evenly among the muffin cups.

Bake for about 20 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center of the muffins comes out clean. Transfer the pan to a rack and cool for 5 minutes before carefully removing each muffin from its mold.

Cari Snell is a mom, wife and the editor and recipe wrangler of Can I get the Recipe? An online source providing weekly printable recipes, shopping lists, great giveaways and more.

Visit us at http://www.canigettherecipe.com/

SUNDAY GIVEAWAY: TOT Yoga DVD

TOT YOGA is a fun, instructive video for parents of toddlers and pre-schoolers from 10 months to 3 years old.

The TOT YOGA dvd is hosted by Khadi Madama, a Registered Yoga Teacher (RYT) and an IAYT registered Yoga Therapist who is a pioneer in the field of applied therapeutic yoga, and hosted the television show, Yours Truly Yoga.

This DVD is incredibly user-friendly, regardless of your yoga skill level, you will enjoy it and your kids will love imitating you and the poses.

The primary goal of Tot Yoga is to induce and increase a toddler’s sleep. But that is only one of the many benefits that engaging in Tot Yoga can provide you and your toddler.

Additional benefits include:
Promotes Calmness
Reduces Stress
Increases Confidence
Improves Concentration
Develops a Healthy Body

This week we are giving away a copy of TOT YOGA to one lucky [soon to be zen] mama!

To be entered in this giveaway, leave a comment answering the following question:

"How do you relax at the end of a stressful day?"

How to earn additional entries:

1.) Become a follower on our blog (publicly) and leave another comment (or let us know if you already are).

2.) Subscribe to the Mama Memo by clicking here and leave another comment (or let us know if you already are).

3.) Blog about this giveaway- with a link back to here. Post YOUR blog entry first and then the comment.

4.) Add the Mama Manifesto button to your sidebar.

5.) Follow us on Twitter AND Tweet about this giveaway. TWEET- "Giveaway- win a copy of the TOT YOGA dvd from @MamaManifesto. Enter at mamamanifesto.com"

6.) Become a fan of Mama Manifesto on Facebook by clicking the button on the left!


[this giveaway will be closed on Saturday at 11 PM, & the winner will be announced next Sunday!]



And now for the winners of last week's Darda NASCAR giveaway:
(((The Dreamer)))


Congratulations! Shoot us an email by 4/4 to mamagiveaways(at)gmail(dot)com with your prize in the subject line, and we will hook you up! Keep checking back for more great giveaways!

the paradox of choice

I've been thinking a lot lately about the paradox of choice - the idea that when people have more choices, it actually leads to greater anxiety.   My son's homecoming from Haiti has caused me to analyze many of the ways we live life here in America.  I am not one of those people who subscribes to the idea that internationally adopted children are "lucky" because they now get to grow up in America.  I think that children benefit from life in a family instead of an institution, but I really believe that there are pros and cons to every culture.  I am aware of some of the benefits he gets from living in America - certainly education, safety, and privilege being at the forefront.  But I am also humble enough to think through some of the parts of our lifestyle that might be less than ideal.

I am often introspective about the contrast between our family life and his life at the orphanage, and one of the things that stands out is the amount of choices we have here.  I'm not always sure this is a good thing.  At the orphanage, life was very predictable.  The nannies didn't have to make a lot of choices.   They wore scrubs every day, and had few distractions from caring for the children.  The kids had a set schedule each day.  They weren't going to Disneyland or running errands.  But they were content.

I'm really wondering about how to simplify our life.  I'm starting to wonder how the reduction of choices might affect our family in positive ways.  What if we had less clothing?  What if we went fewer places?  What if we drastically pared down our meals, our errands, our toys, our activities?

I don't have any answers or big revelations yet.  But it's what I'm chewing on today.  That, and some orange Tic-Tacs.

Kids Music That Won't Drive You Nuts

I love when I find music that is made specifically for kids that doesn't make me crazy. Our kids have grown up on a steady diet of good music, and when I say "good", I mean music that can be appreciated by adults and children alike. The Beatles, Martin Sexton, Jack Johnson, Switchfoot, Norah Jones... these are just a few of the artists that make us all happy.

I do notice that my kids get excited about songs that are written with a little more of their world view in mind. Less of the "Hey Jude" vibe, and more of "Tricycle, tricycle, love you with all of my mind..." Some of our favorite children's artists are Francis England, Milkshake, Jack Johnson's Curious George soundtrack. These are artists that are so stinking good at singing about things that make kids think and tick (and talk - be forewarned).

And now, we have a new favorite tunes maker that writes with the child's world view in mind - Sarah Lee Guthrie. How could she not be amazing with that DNA? Her style is mellow, slightly twangy, and perfect for sipping lemonade on a sunny day.

We have a free download for you today so that you can get a taste of Sarah's style. My kids love their cousins more than they love ice cream. Seriously. And, that is saying a lot because they have a whole lotta' love for ice cream. They ask about when they will get to play with their cousins again daily. They count the days, the hours, the minutes until the next time we will be united, and this song had their ears perked up and their hearts skipping a beat.

Enjoy!

FREE DOWNLOAD
Please enjoy a free download of 'Cuz We're Cousins from
Go Waggaloo.

'Cuz We're Cousins

MP3

What are your favorite tunes to blast in the house or car with your kiddos?

TALK BACK: does it take a village?

We've all heard the old agage that it takes a village to raise a child. How does that play out in our modern society? I think kids benefit from guidance from their community at large. I generally don't go around scolding other kids, but if I see a child doing something egregious, I will tell the parent. If the parent is not around, I might even talk to the child directly. I would really hope that another parent would do the same for me if my kid did something I missed. It seems strange to me that an adult would observe a child behaving badly and then do nothing . . . but then again I've also seen parents really get frustrated when another person intervenes with their child.

Where do you land on this one? If you saw a neighbor or a kid at the park doing something offensive, would you alert the parent, or talk to the child if they weren't around? Or do you take the stance that it isn't your place to parent someone else's child?

And the (Veggie Tales Pistachio DVD) winner is ...

{{{Madwoman doing cartwheels}}}

and

{{{Crown the Queen}}}

Congratulations! Shoot us an email by 3/31 to mamagiveaways(at)gmail(dot)com with your prize in the subject line, and we will hook you up! Keep checking back for more great giveaways!

Real Simple's Steak & Balsamic veggies Sandwich

This is true love.

At first bite!

For the recipe, visit Real Simple here.

Real Simple - we love you!

Ten Commandments for Little League Moms

I did not grow up in an athletic household. We were what you might call an "artsy fartsy" family. I am much more familiar with ballet shoes and chord charts than I am with cleats and shin guards. The whole concept of being a "sports mom" is both intimidating and a little foreign to me. I am quickly learning what this all means for my life (and free time) for the next 18 years.

Jafta has been in t-ball for several weeks now, which of course now makes me an expert on how to be a good baseball mom. So, for the benefit of those other non-sporty moms out there, I give you my Ten Commandments for Little League Moms.

1. Thou Shalt Know the Lingo
Don't continually refer to the practices as "rehearsals", or ask the team mom when they will be getting their "costumes". Do make sure to learn some catch phrases to yell from the sidelines. Just follow what the other moms are yelling. Screaming things like "keep your eye on the ball!" or "ready position! get in ready position!!" will make you sound like you know what you are doing, and also like you actually care. Which you do. Care. Very much. Dont' forget that.

2. Thou Shalt Take This Very, Very Seriously
Sure, they are four years old, and sure, you just signed him up because his friends were doing it. But once you are in Little League, you need to start placing an irrational emphasis on perfomance and competition for your child. The first rehearsal practice is not a good time to casually ask the other moms if any of this is the least bit age appropriate, and if they wouldn't be having more fun if we just let them run around the field. Comments like, "Oh my gosh they've been running this mock game for 45 minutes. I'm bored to tears and can't imagine how they must feel" will not be appreciated. Nor will posing the question, "Do they really have to go to the games every Saturday?"



3. Thou Shalt Dress the Part
You are a sports mom now. It's time to look like a sports mom, so no one will mistake you for having your own identity or sense of fashion. Go buy some t-shirts and baseball caps that will let everybody know what team your child is on. Also, aren't those jeans a little flashy? Wouldn't you be more comfortable in a matching windbreaker and track pants? And please leave the cute shoes at home. This is sneaker country. And I don't mean Converse. You will also have the opportunity to buy some Cookie Lee Baseball Bracelets that are dressy enough to wear to work, so that no matter what time it is, everyone who sees you will know: You're a baseball mom.

4. Thou Shalt Have the Right Gear
Your child will need cleats - and you will need to do a google search to figure out what that means. Another hint - showing up to the first practice with your son wearing a toddler-sized velcro mitt and attached velcro ball just might make the coach hate you. It's time to familiarize yourself with a SPORTING GOODS STORE, because the baby section of Target is apparently not where baseball mitts should be purchased. I know, it's scary. Take some deep breaths. You can do this. Also, you need to make sure they are wearing their team hat to every rehearsal practice. Because if not, the coach will publicly shame your child by asking about it as soon as he steps on the field.

5. Thou Shalt Peddle Things No One Wants
Are you ready to be that friend? The one who is constantly hitting up others to pay for their kid's activities? Who doesn't want to be asked to buy crappy chocolate bars and tickets to a pancake breakfast that even YOU don't want to attend? And did someone say Raffle Tickets!?? You get to sell those, too! Don't take it personally when people start screening your calls.

6. Thou Shalt Not Wonder What the Hell the Registration Fee Covered

Sure, that $90 covered the apparently very expensive costume uniform. And sure, once you've added up the additional $200 you will contribute (because you refuse to hit up family and friends to buy candy, pancakes and raffle tickets), you will realize that this is more expensive than your last family vacation. But make no mistake - Little League is a volunteer organization. Best not to question where this money is going while you are forced to man the snack bar and your husband is needed at every game to keep ten four-year-olds from anarchy on the field.

7. Thou Shalt Engage in Conversation with Other Baseball Moms
Apparently bringing a book and isolating yourself on your blanket might be considered a bit rude. So for the duration of the 90 minute practice you will need to engage in chit-chat with women you don't really know. Topics include How Much Your Husband Practices With Your Child, How Much Your Child's Baseball Skills Are Increasing, and How Much You Are Volunteering in Baseball.

8. Thou Shalt Practice At Home.
Again, this is serious business. Weekly practice are not nearly enough to teach your child the skills they will need to be a serious t-ball player. You will need to practice at home - daily. The coach will remind you of this every week, and give you tips for things to work on at home. How else are they gonna make the major leagues?

9. Thou Shalt Bribe Their Motivation with Sweets

Just in case your child is not taking this seriously enough, or is feeling a little fidgety and done half-way through the game, you can let them know that if they finish, there is a cookie waiting for them. Not that your four-year-old isn't naturally committed to team sports. This is all about them. And their insane love of the game and desire to win a 90-minute game. Right?

10. Thou Shalt Suck It Up

Because no matter how uncomfortable all of this makes you, and no matter how much you want to mock the entire endeavor, your son thinks that being on a real baseball team is the coolest thing that ever happened to him.

SUNDAY GIVEAWAY: Darda Nascar Racetrack Set

This week we have an incredible giveaway from Darda, that is sure to get your motors running.
The Victory Lane racetrack is a NASCAR-inspired, super fun option for the car enthusiast. Team up with Darda and NASCAR for an exciting new twist on racing! Two licensed NASCAR heroes dash through twists, turns and tangled loops at scale speeds up to 600 mph. As the cars round the final curve and head for Victory Lane, a checkered flag signals the winner. This set comes with car, track and instructions for layout. We love that it does not use batteries, and kids simply rev up their engines by pulling the cars backwards and then let them go to race. A great way to test out cause and effect. Another benefit - is this is one toy that two kiddos can play with at the same time. The more collaboration, the more fun!


Darda is generously giving away one complete set to a lucky mama!


To be entered in this giveaway, leave a comment answering the following question:

"Would you be more excited about watching cars race,
or driving one of the race cars in a race?"

How to earn additional entries:

1.) Become a follower on our blog (publicly) and leave another comment (or let us know if you already are).

2.) Subscribe to the Mama Memo by clicking here and leave another comment (or let us know if you already are).

3.) Blog about this giveaway- with a link back to here. Post YOUR blog entry first and then the comment.

4.) Add the Mama Manifesto button to your sidebar.

5.) Follow us on Twitter AND Tweet about this giveaway. TWEET- "Giveaway- win a kids Nascar Victory Lane Darda racetrack from @MamaManifesto. Enter at mamamanifesto.com"

6.) Become a fan of Mama Manifesto on Facebook by clicking the button on the left!


[this giveaway will be closed on Saturday at 11 PM, & the winner will be announced next Sunday!]



And now for the winners of last week's Peet's coffee giveaway:
(((Suzannah @ So Much Shouting/Laughter)))
(((JC )))
((( Melomatic)))
(((Cheryl F.)))
(((watching the waters)))


Congratulations! Shoot us an email by 3/28 to mamagiveaways(at)gmail(dot)com with your prize in the subject line, and we will hook you up! Keep checking back for more great giveaways!

paradox of choice

I've been thinking a lot lately about the paradox of choice - the idea that when people have more choices, it actually leads to greater anxiety.   Kembe's homecoming from Haiti has caused me to analyze many of the ways we live life here in America.  I am not one of those people who subscribes to the idea that internationally adopted children are "lucky" because they now get to grow up in America.  I think that children benefit from life in a family instead of an institution, but I really believe that there are pros and cons to every culture.  I am aware of some of the benefits he gets from living in America - certainly education, safety, and privilege being at the forefront.  But I am also humble enough to think through some of the parts of our lifestyle that might be less than ideal.

I am often introspective about the contrast between our family life and his life at the orphanage, and one of the things that stands out is the amount of choices we have here.  I'm not always sure this is a good thing.  At the orphanage, life was very predictable.  The nannies didn't have to make a lot of choices.   They wore scrubs every day, and had few distractions from caring for the children.  The kids had a set schedule each day.  They weren't going to Disneyland or running errands.  But they were content.

I'm really wondering about how to simplify our life.  I'm starting to wonder how the reduction of choices might affect our family in positive ways.  What if we had less clothing?  What if we went fewer places?  What if we drastically pared down our meals, our errands, our toys, our activities?

I don't have any answers yet.  But I'm wrestling with this stuff.


Speaking of choices, Kembe chose his own outfit today.  Board shorts, plaid shirt, beanie, sandals.    I think he is looking like a Southern California kid!

My letter to Disney...

Dear Disney,

Why do you hate me? Why do you insist upon creating 100 different versions of the cars from the movie "Cars"?

Did you really need to create a Lightening McQueen that has his tongue sticking out, the Lightening McQueen with some dirt on his face, the Classic McQueen, the regular Lightening McQueen, and the Dinoco Lightening McQueen? That is just with the Lightening McQueen merchandise. Don't even get me started on all the different versions of Chick Hicks and Doc Hudson.

Really? Do you know what this does to moms like me? Do you know how frustrating it is at bedtime to be scrambling through the house looking for "Tongue Queen" when all I can find is "Regular Queen"? My eyesight just does not measure up to the laser-like sight of my son. He can see which car is which from a mile away.

Please stop the madness.

Think of the mothers.

Sincerely,

Ali Bray

why I don't return emails

I have been trying to return three emails all day. ALL DAY. Three emails - emails that require just a few minutes of uninterrupted attention. How hard can that be? I think I sat down 20 times today to attempt this. Here are a few things that took precedence:

• Breaking up fights between kids on the trampoline
• Attempting to superglue a tiny lightsaber to Luke Skywalker's hand, so that Karis does not inject the lightsaber that Jafta continues to leave on the floor DESPITE SPECIFIC INSTRUCTIONS TO LEAVE UP HIGH AND OUT OF HER REACH
• Charging the batteries to each kid's remote control car, which requires a screwdriver, an allen wrench, and a three-pronged plug (a rarity in this 50-year-old house)
• Fixing the straps of India's backpack (x12)
• Tying the shoelaces of Air Jordans when the boys decide they want to play basketball. Untying when the boys decide they want to jump on the trampoline. No, basketball. No, trampoline. No, basketball. No, OH MY GOSH MAKE UP YOUR MIND.
• Pulling small objects out of Karis’ mouth. Ad infinitum.
• Doing three loads of laundry
• Unpeeling baby oranges
• Following directions to drink a playdoh smoothie, and eat a playdoh pizza, and then following directions to pretend it is yummy, no yucky, no now it's disgusting.
• Hosting a tea party for India and Princess Tiana
• Swiffering spilled tea
• Administering four baths
• Preparing for a class
  
• Searching for lost DVD for tomorrow's class
• Write cathartic blog post about inability to return emails

How about you? What are the things you do all day, that keep you from getting anything done?

Mid-Week Giveaway: Veggie Tales Pistachio

Happy St. Patrick's Day. In honor of this very green inspired day, we have an extra giveaway for you mamas.

The latest Veggie Tales' video is out - VeggieTales Pistachio: The Little Boy That Woodn’t. Pistachio is a creative parody of the beloved story of Pinocchio, and teaches a timely lesson on listening to parents (ahem) and the importance of family. Pistachio stars Larry the Cucumber as a toymaker named Gelato, the assistant Cricket, Junior Asparagus as Pistachio and many other Veggie favorites.

If you are wondering where the correlation is to St. Patrick's Day and Veggie Tales - well, Pistachio is green.

If you are looking for some great Easter basket gift ideas, check out these fab bundles available from Big Idea Entertainment.

Your kids are going to love it, so enter to win!

We will be choosing 2 winners, who will receive their very own copy of Pistachio.

To be entered to win, please leave us a comment answering the following question:

"On a scale of 1 to 10, how often do your kids listen and respond to what you are asking them to do the very first time you ask them?"

How to earn additional entries:

1.) Become a follower on our blog (publicly) and leave another comment (or let us know if you already are).

2.) Subscribe to the Mama Memo by clicking here and leave another comment (or let us know if you already are).

3.) Blog about this giveaway- with a link back to here. Post YOUR blog entry first and then the comment.

4.) Add the Mama Manifesto button to your sidebar.

5.) Follow us on Twitter AND Tweet about this giveaway. TWEET- "Giveaway- win 1 of two copies of latest Veggies Tales : Pistachio from @MamaManifesto. Enter at mamamanifesto.com"

6.) Become a fan of Mama Manifesto on Facebook by clicking the button on the left!


[this giveaway will be closed on Monday at 11 PM, & the winner will be announced next Tuesday!]

Talk Back: To nap or not to nap?

It is the question of the day at our home right now. My son just turned 4, and I am really struggling with cutting his nap. On the days that he does take a nap, he is wired until about 9 PM. But, if he doesn't nap, he becomes a melted version of himself, and I really struggle to have any space in my day that is quiet and allows me to get stuff done uninterrupted.

That nap window is a sacred time in the world of a mama.

When did you know it was time to cut the nap? And, do you have any tips on how to implement "quiet time" or any other tools for moms to have a bit of a break in the day?

Quinoa with Garbanzo Beans & Herbs

This is a recipe from a recent issue of Better Homes & Gardens. I adapted it slightly, but it is oh-so-good! You could also substitute whole wheat cous-cous for the quinoa. Would be delicious served along with grilled chicken or steak.

Ingredients:

1 cup quinoa

2 cups chicken broth or vegetable broth

2 ears fresh corn

1 small container grape tomatoes, sliced

1 sweet red or orange bell pepper, diced finely

1 15 oz can chickpeas

1/2 cup crumbled feta cheese

1/4 cup finely chopped red onion

3 T. finely chopped fresh basil

2 T. finely chopped fresh flat leaf parsley

1/4 c olive oil

2 T. lemon juice

1 cup diced, cooked beets (optional)

Romaine leaves

1. Rinse quinoa in a fine mesh sieve under cold running water; drain.

2. In a saucepan, bring broth to boiling and add quinoa. Return to boiling; reduce heat to a simmer. Simmer, covered, 15 minutes or until broth is absorbed.

3. Remove from heat and set aside to cool.

4. Cut corn from cobs.

5. Rinse and drain the chickpeas.

6. In a bowl, combine quinoa, corn, chickpeas, cheese, onion, and herbs.

7. In a separate bowl prepare dressing by whisking together oil, lemon juice, 1/2 teaspoon each of salt AND pepper. Add dressing to quinoa mixture and toss to coat.

8. Cover and let stand at least 1 hour, or cover and refrigerate up to 24 hours. Bring to room temperature before serving.

9. Stir in beets just before serving. Suggested serving: serve in bowls lined with romaine leaves.

Prepares approximately 8 servings.

SUNDAY GIVEAWAY: Peet's Coffee :: Uzuri East African Blend

{orange studio}

There are a lot of coffee addicts in America.

I'm one of them.

I love me my cup o' joe in the morning. I am not just one of those people who likes the jolt in the morning. I LOVE the flavor. Coffee, cream and a bit of agave - I am in heaven. I love the taste so much, I would drink coffee all day long if I was not caffeine sensitive (meaning - if I have a cup of regular coffee after 1 pm, I am awake until the wee hours of the morning). In fact, my only issue with one of my all time favorite shows, "Gilmore Girls", was that Lorelai's huge love for coffee tempted me to drink it every time I watched the show (often after the time cut-off for me).

I have long been a big fan of Peet's coffee. Their coffee is so, so good. And, their baristas take pride in making your drink slowly, and perfectly. For the "coffee foodies" I know, Peet's gets their vote for best taste. Peet's recently introduced a Uzuri African Blend - a coffee that is bold beyond flavor. Uzuri, means "excellent and beautiful" in Swahili, was named by the Kenyan, Tanzanian and Rwandan farmers who grow the beans.

Peet's has created a sustainable business model for thousands of farmers and their communities. Through farmer training and improved processing, the farmers are now producing coffee that meets Peet's strict quality standards, and earning them an estimated 30 percent more for their crop. That is a really big deal to these farmers, and we are all about supporting sustainable business!

This great blend will be available in grocery stores nationwide until March 31st. But, it will be available in Peet's coffeehouses and at Peets.com, as a permanent addition to Peet's collection of signature blends.

Peet's is going to give 5 lucky mamas the chance to try this coffee! We are giving away five 1 pound bags of this yummy Uzuri blend.


To be entered, please answer the following question:

"Are you, too, a coffee addict? Is it the caffeine or the flavor that does it for you?"

How to earn additional entries:

1.) Become a follower on our blog (publicly) and leave another comment (or let us know if you already are).

2.) Subscribe to the Mama Memo by clicking here and leave another comment (or let us know if you already are).

3.) Blog about this giveaway- with a link back to here. Post YOUR blog entry first and then the comment.

4.) Add the Mama Manifesto button to your sidebar.

5.) Follow us on Twitter AND Tweet about this giveaway. TWEET- "Giveaway- win one of five 1-lb. bags of Peet's new Uzuri blend coffee from @MamaManifesto. Enter at mamamanifesto.com"

6.) Become a fan of Mama Manifesto on Facebook by clicking the button on the left!


[this giveaway will be closed on Saturday at 11 PM, & the winner will be announced next Sunday!]



And now for the winners of last week's giveaway:
(((The Chubby Dove)))
(((sweetsue)))
(((Corinne @ The Splendid Stuff)))
(((ellie)))
(((mail4rosey)))


Congratulations! Shoot us an email by 3/21 to mamagiveaways(at)gmail(dot)com with your prize in the subject line, and we will hook you up! Keep checking back for more great giveaways!

Learning how to feel

Yesterday Miles looked at me and said, I'm keeping my mad mad mad right inside, while he put his hands on his chest like a feelings plug. In here, he said. I'm keeping it inside.

He said it like it was good. He said it like I'd appreciate that he wasn't letting it out. And then when I started to explain that it's best to let it out in a way that doesn't hurt anyone, he interrupted with a, I mean, I'm putting my mad mad mad outside. I'm taking it out, that's what I meant to say. It was like a correction he didn't mean, a quick response,what he thought I wanted to hear.

He said it like a people-pleaser,
with no regard for himself,
just an effort to keep me happy.
He forgot about the mad mad mad
and thought about me instead.

And then he looked confused, his big eyes looking up at me...

In or out, Mom. Which is it?

Out, child. Out.

But don't look at my example. I choose in far too often.

--------

If I could teach my boys only one thing, it would be this - Let yourself feel.

Sure, I'd like to add a list of things to that, an exhaustive list filled with thousands of things we mothers agonize over, big things that matter, that we feel responsible for: Have faith, believe in yourself, take care of your body, work hard, be kind to people and always respect and honor women, take responsibility for your actions, be honest...

Then I'd like to add all the small things I at least pretend I'm concerned about, or am simply annoyed by: Chew with your mouth closed, take your shoes off, inside voice, no whining, clean up after yourself, finish your peas, put your dishes in the sink...

But what is any of that worth if they can't feel? What is faith if not felt? What is kindness if not genuinely from the heart? Why should they take their shoes off if they don't actually care about the person who owns the floors? Why put their dishes in the sink if they don't feel true respect for the one who made the meal? Why open the door for a girl and really listen to her unless their heart honestly treasures hers?

We do so many seemingly good and honorable things robotically, habitual actions born out of rules on our minds rather than beliefs in our hearts, the place where emotions live and spring out to the pits of our stomachs.

That's where we should be living from, our heart-guts. But we can't if we won't allow ourselves to feel.

--------

My boys are in the stage of constant NO and Don't and Stop It. For their safety and my sanity, all day long, that's pretty much all they hear if I'm not careful. Just imagine what that does to a person. Or maybe you don't have to, maybe you remember it in your own life, as a child or in all the moments at any age that your voice wasn't heard, or you were told, subtly or not, that your feelings were unjustified or just plain silly.

Grown-ups have a way of invalidating children and each other without ever speaking a word, and many times while speaking too many.

To these small people of mine, the anger or frustration or hurt in them that's coming out in a whine or cry or hit or scream is everything, and already Miles is learning to stop these feelings for the sake of others or to avoid punishment.

That scares me, of course. But I have to remember that everything is a process, even learning how to feel. It takes most of us a lifetime to understand how to feel and what to do with our emotions. It's hard work.

I looked at Miles' face yesterday, the expectancy in his eyes. And I thought, If I could teach my boys only one thing, it would be this: Let yourself feel. To feel is to live, and what is life if not for living?

So I told him that it's best to get his anger out in a way that doesn't hurt him or anyone else. I gave him examples and then I added something: but if you forget and you hold it in and starts to make you feel bad or do things that aren't okay, I'll still love you. I'll love you if your mad is in or out. I'll love you no matter what.

Maybe understanding our feelings starts there. With a gift. A feeling. Unconditional love.


~Heather
The Extraordinary Ordinary

Eye Candy to get your creative juices flowing

{photo by Blue Cricket Designs}

If any of you are nesting, and want some great tutorials that seem incredibly user friendly, check out this compilation on Make & Takes. I love that wall art above!!!

{photo by Julie @ Joy's Hope}

And, I about ruined my computer by drooling all over the keyboard when I saw Julie's post about how to make a ginormous chalkboard. I love the chalkboard, but I LOVE the aqua wall behind it. Makes me really happy. How fun would it be to start a tradition of scribbling love notes to each other?

{photo featured on Make & Takes, by Little Birdies}

If you are looking for a fun project to do with your kids, check out these really great greeting cards. Greeting cards that you can plant. In the ground. Yep. Your kids will be so excited! You can see the post on how to here.

If you aren't feeling this creative. Or, if you simply do not have the time to take on a project - do not feel an ounce of being "less than"! Just carve out a bit of time to color with your kids today. It will be therapeutic for you in some way. And, for the competitive creatives, we learned of this fun contest being run by Little Miss Matched. Check it out, if you are feeling up for a creative challenge.

Got any creative projects cooking? Any favorite links you want to share?

You are all invited ...

this is huge.

this is beauty on display.

we know this may not be a possibility for those of you who don't live within driving distance. but, we all know people everywhere, and maybe you know some peeps in the local area that should be invited. (hint hint: go invite them) And, after you invite them, make sure you visit the isanctuary shop to see their amazing jewlery line that is hand made by survivors.

Who is iSanctuary?

We are big fans of this organization. They empower survivors of human trafficking.

So, think of going through the worst ordeal imaginable.

You have scars.

You are broken.

isanctuary is there to help with the healing.

Gentle hands.

They have a vision for you that will open your world to hope and healing.

And, maybe even some joy.

They can keep your hands busy while your heart and mind heal.

They pour courage into you.

This will be a beautiful night. We hope to see you there ...

iSanctuary at Sawdust
April 10, 2010 6:30pm-10:30pm
Sawdust Festival Grounds, Laguna Beach, California

Come hear from local survivors of human trafficking...
Music, art, drinks, appetizers, coffee bar, prizes, raffle and auction.

Tickets $25
VIP $75

Tickets Available Now!

iSanctuary

Shop

Thanks for Sharing

Last week, I made a desperate mama plea for your recipes for comforting and healing chicken soup. I love that side of women - the sharing side. I love that if I am at a park and I see another mom with a stroller that seems to be working for her, I can ask her about it, and TYPICALLY, she will share why she loves it, where she got it, and some other great tidbits. When we started Mama Manifesto, one of the visions we had for this site was that it would be a place where moms could share what is working, what is not working, be able to laugh about the hard stuff, or cry. Moms in the trenches. Sharing. I loved the tips and recipes you all shared last week.

This recipe is what I am making for dinner tonight. I LOVE orzo, and the hint of lemon had me at hello. Thank you, Cari, for sharing with us all. Check out Cari's blog for more great recipes and helpful tips for the cooking mama.

Get Ya Better Chicken Soup with Orzo and a Hint of Lemon
(Prep Time: 15 minutes/Total Time: 60 minutes. Serves 4 - 6)

Ingredients:
1 medium onion, diced small
4 medium carrots, peeled and diced small
2 stalks celery, diced
handful parsley, chopped fine
3 tablespoons olive oil
sea salt and fresh ground pepper to taste
6 cups chicken stock
4 small chicken breasts, cut into bite sized pieces
1 cup orzo
zest from one lemon (make sure to zest only the skin...not the white pith)

Directions:
Sautee onion, carrots, celery, parsely, salt and pepper in olive oil over medium heat until onions are soft, about 8 - 10 minutes.

Turn up heat to high and chicken stock. Bring to a boil.

Add chicken. Chicken should be fully covered by the stock. If not, add a little more stock.

Once boiling again, reduce heat to low and simmer for at least 30 minutes.

Add orzo and lemon zest. Cook about 8 more minutes until orzo is al dente.

Serve with warm crusty bread! Yum!

SUNDAY GIVEAWAY: etnies

etnies is the first skateboarder-owned and operated global action sports footwear and apparel company. Committed to creating innovative, long-lasting products to help kids play and grow, etnies sponsors a world class team of skateboarding, surfing, snowboarding, moto x and BMX riders and is dedicated to giving back to each of these communities. Perfect for both boys and girls, we happen to love their line of kids shoes!

This week we are giving away five pairs of the RVM in Black/Grey/White! This style comes in both toddler and kids sizes.

To be entered, please answer the following question:

"What is your favorite style of etnies shoes for kids, and which size would you choose?"

How to earn additional entries:

1.) Become a follower on our blog (publicly) and leave another comment (or let us know if you already are).

2.) Subscribe to the Mama Memo by clicking here and leave another comment (or let us know if you already are).

3.) Blog about this giveaway- with a link back to here. Post YOUR blog entry first and then the comment.

4.) Add the Mama Manifesto button to your sidebar.

5.) Follow us on Twitter AND Tweet about this giveaway. TWEET- "Giveaway- win one of five pairs of etnies kids' shoes from @MamaManifesto. Enter at mamamanifesto.com"

6.) Become a fan of Mama Manifesto on Facebook by clicking the button on the left!


[this giveaway will be closed on Saturday at 11 PM, & the winner will be announced next Sunday!]


And now for the winner of last week's giveaway:
(((Life With the Crazies)))



Congratulations! Shoot us an email by 3/14 to mamagiveaways(at)gmail(dot)com with your prize in the subject line, and we will hook you up! Keep checking back for more great giveaways!

Famous Failures

I love the concept of "Failing Forward". I recognize that so often, because of my perfectionism, I will not try something for fear of failing. I saw this video today and thought it was powerful. What a great reminder for adults and children to continue pushing forward.

In almost anything any of us will ever try, we will be bad before we are good. Good before we are great. Great before we are amazing.

Fail forward today.

quotable

I love this quote, and I think it's important for all parents, not just parents of children of color:

We can choose to actively influence our children's attitudes. With our encouragement children will test and think through their beliefs about race, ethnicity, and religion. They are unlikely to ask the necessary hard questions without our help. It is up to us to take the initiative!

Children care about justice, respect, and fairness. Squabbles about sharing, concerns about cliques, and problems with playmates -- the daily trials of childhood -- reflect their active interest in these social issues. So do the questions children ask, when they feel safe enough to ask them.

One important gift we can give our children is to create a family in which difficult issues like racism are openly discussed. By talking openly and listening without censure, we can learn about our children's concerns and help them find connections between larger social issues and their own life experiences.

from CivilRights.org (via Adoptiontalk)

weaned

My youngest daughter and I have officially said goodbye to our nursing relationship. I didn't expect it to happen so soon. I thought we would go well past her first birthday - we had been pretty exclusive. I was rather dedicated . . . even taking her along to a half-marathon girl's trip and a trip to Haiti. It's a little frustrating that the whole thing fizzled just a few weeks later, since both of those trips would have been a lot less stressful without a baby in tow. I mean, A LOT LESS STRESSFUL.

(that would be us, nursing in the jumpseat of a military C-130 jet,
ready to be evacuated from Haiti)

But something happened once our newly adopted son Kembe came home. It just became more and more difficult to find the space and time to sit still with Karis. I was distracted, and she was distracted. If we weren't in a quiet room, she was squirming and looking around and pretty much trying to order her milk "to go". (Ouch). And since the last time I was able to sit in a quiet room was, um, NEVER, nursing just started to be a tug-of-war. But more than that, Kembe was really going through some grieving in those first few weeks. I needed my arms available. Karis is a happy, attached little baby who is content to sit and drink from a bottle as she interacts with the world. I felt like Kembe needed that spot on my lap.

So, over the course of the last month, we transitioned to a few more bottles each day. I tried to maintain the nursing just in the morning and at night. But each time I tried, Karis acted more and more irritated with it. She is a girl on the go. She is cruising around the furniture, taking her bottle along for the ride. I could sense that it was time . . . but I just wasn't ready.

I spent several days last week trying to have some closure with our nursing relationship. I wanted to have that special last session . . . where I would gaze at her lovingly and rub her head, and have some magical symbolic moment that I could remember forever. Every night, I would try to have this moment, and every night it would be interrupted by a screaming 3-year-old, or Jafta trying to build a fort over my head, or Karis trying to squirm away to chase after Kembe. Finally, I just realized I needed to let it go. The last two times I tried, she cried as if the very offer was an insult. She had moved on.

So yesterday, I cleaned out the bins that held my nursing covers. It was also the bin that held the receiving blankets, and the burp clothes and all the other items you use for a newborn. I folded them away with the bittersweet thought that I would never use these items again. Karis is our last baby. We will never have a need for this newborn paraphernalia that we collected with such intention and anticipation.

For some reason, this was just so profoundly sad for me. So much so, that I sobbed to the point that Mark had to hide the children from their grief-stricken mother for a good fifteen minutes. It's the parenting paradox, that is so painful and confusing at the same time. I spend so much of my day assuring myself that things will get easier. There are so many aspects to this season that are difficult - so many little ones that are so dependent. It's easy to blissfully look ahead to a more autonomous future when they get just a little more independence. And yet, it's so painful that they are growing so fast. I'm so in love with my sweet little Karis, and just a little devastated that she won't be this chunky, squealing, raspberry-blowing baby forever.

photo by DrewB

TALK BACK: living out-of-the-box

I recently stumbled across this blog, about a family who sold everything to live in an RV and travel the US with their two kids. They have committed to a nomadic lifestyle, and are finding that it fits them very well. While living out of an RV may not be my thing, I admire their willingness to step out of their comfort zone.

Have you ever have dreams or aspirations to live differently? Ever thought about living abroad, or pulling your kids out of school? Have dreams of buying land and living off the grid, or even creating your own sustainable garden? Ever thought of moving into a loft in a new city, or being a part of a cooperative community? If you dream wildly, what things would you love to do differently?

What are you already doing differently?

I want your recipe today

It all started with a cold. Then, there was this pesky lingering cough. Each day I would tell myself, "I am sure it will be better tomorrow."

The pesky cough was persistent.

Pesky cough started causing some intense pain in my ribs on the right side.

Finally decided (okay, my sister held my kids hostage until I agreed to go) to head into the doctor to see why the ribs hurt and if I should be worried about the cough.

Diagnosis :: bronchitis & pneumonia, with a fractured rib.

The upside - dear husband is a champion and responding with "all hands on deck". Getting to rest and recuperate is not so bad.

So, today, Dear Mamas, I would love to see your best chicken soup recipes. I know you have them. And, for that matter - what are your best tips and remedies for recovering from a chest cold or cough?