TALK BACK: How much privacy do you give your kids?

It's an age-old parenting question: Do kids deserve privacy, or is a vigilant parent entitled to some snooping? And how much is too much?

What is your approach to privacy with your child? Are you a "door stays open" kind of family, or do you think a child needs some space that is just their own? Will you be a text-reading, phone monitoring mom, or will you give them space if you feel that trust is warranted? Is the diary off-limits, or is it a good source of information?
Do you value honoring privacy or being in-the-know?


  1. I plan to be a snooping mom! I think something like a diary is off-limits. But I will check online history, emails, and texts. There is just to much junk out there to trust young kids with. It's a different world today.


  2. I don't really know yet. I know I want my kids to know there are boundaries to their freedom, but I want them to feel trusted. THAT'S a tricky balance.

    I hope we'll consider each child and their situations as they arise, with the overall "thing" being communication-lots and lots and lots of time spent with our boys, with real interest and excitement in their lives, so they feel trusted and respected enough to keep talking.

    I have no idea if that made sense...

  3. I'm going to be a snooper. To a point. The computer will be in a public area and subject to frequent inspection. I wouldn't let my kids into an "Adult Superstore" alone, and the internet has the potential to be that, sadly.

    The diary is off limits in my opinion though. They should be able to write their own thoughts down without fear. The inside of their own head should be a safe place.

    I hope to be the kind of mum whose kids feel they can talk to though. I'm going to work really, really hard at being open, non-judgmental (Tricky one), and not shutting them down because I'm too busy to answer questions or whatnot.

    I think it'll be worth the work.

  4. I am with Kimberly. I don't want to look in diary or journal. Computer and phones (by the time my kids have their own phone, I am sure it will be a gnarly tool!) I would keep tabs on. If I thought my kids' lives were in danger (for reals), I would snoop in the diary.

    Augh. I hate that those days will come someday. Hopefully we are all doing the hard work now laying the foundation for a really solid relationship down the road with honesty and trust!


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